Good afternoon darklings.  I’ve been told today that I’m a broken record and need to give up on certain things or people.  I try not to be because I know who that person is does not exist anymore.  But it’s difficult to let go of someone you thought you knew to be true at one time.  Especially when you gave everything to that person and, for whatever reason, that wasn’t enough.  It’s hard to accept that maybe you were only enough for a little wp-1456823245224.jpegwhile.  And the person you promised your life to, was not that person at all.

When you and that person go through something so hard that you just know that if you can survive it together, everything will be ok and it isn’t?  That’s a hard reality to face.  Especially when you weren’t expecting it and the person who replaced you is a lesser woman.  Someone having their shit together doesn’t make them a better person necessarily.  It makes them organized.  Not forgiving.  Not nurturing.  Not accepting.  And definitely not loving.  Not if they’re worried more about appearances than wp-1457169387012.jpegsubstance.

But the friend who told me I’m being redundant is right.  I can’t fault her on that one.  It would piss me off too.  I need to turn the other face and move forward with what is and not wait around for what I want.  It’s done nothing but harm me and how do you watch a friend self-destruct without saying something?

So from this point forward I’m not waiting.  I can’t anymore.  It’s been too much and affected too many aspects of my life.  I can only hurt so much for one person.  My kids?  I would die for.  Anyone else?  There has to be a limit.  And I think, I hope, I’ve reached mine.