Good morning my lovelies.  I know I said it might be a while but I’m awake and I’ve got coffee and everyone else is asleep.  The Frasier episode I’m watching isn’t holding my attention, so here we are.

There’s really nothing new to say.  Has anything improved?  Nope.  Have they gotten worse?  Marginally.  If you just went by the cigarette issue and the fact that I’m downing cups of coffee with just creamer when I’m a cream and sugar girl, it’s really bad.  I’ve even attempted putting chocolate syrup in there and, just to save you, just in case, it doesn’t work.  I’m starting to get used to it though, so maybe this is a good thing.  Who needs all of that extra sugar, right?  It’s actually the whole cigarette issue that I’m having problems with.  And I’m not ready to quit yet.

The last two blogs were very depressing, I think.  So I’m trying to keep this one on the brighter side of things.  Is it working?  Maybe if I pretend hard enough even I’ll believe for a second or two.  I doubt it though.  I’m not delusional.  But I’ll pretend it’s all good for the kids’ sakes.  If I freak out, then they freak out.  Eventually, like very soon, I won’t be able to lie anymore when they ask if everything is going to be alright.  Maybe it will be for them, sort of, but not for all of us.  But as long as they’re ok, it’s alright.  It might as well be because there’s no changing it now.

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